February 2007 - Sincerely Sire Newsletter

DOG EATS TV

I try to be nice to our little one-year-old Boston Terrier, Finn, and this is what I get.

Roe told me that she had heard somewhere that it was a good idea for your dog’s peace of mind to leave the TV on, with the sound up, when you’re away from home, so I did that for Finn.

So, the other night I’m sitting on the couch across from our big screen TV talking to Roe when I happen to glance at the TV speaker box under the screen. It looks kind of funny, so I look a little closer and then blow my top. What the @#$%! – “Look! Look at the TV!” I screech to Roe and the little beast standing beside her, AKA Finn. “What did you do dog?!”

 Finn cowers as low to the floor as she can get, ears pinned back. “Look,” I tell Roe. Look! She has eaten the TV! My big screen TV!”

 I put my fist through the hole that Finn has chewed through the speaker cover. I’m in disbelief. Frantically I remove the speaker cover to see if she has done any damage to the guts of the TV. “Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Look at this. Look! She has eaten the guts of the TV!” There are chewed wire ends sticking out everywhere, and the speaker itself has been completely eaten.

 “I can’t believe it. I just can’t believe it,” I utter to myself over and over again. She must have heard something on that speaker that made her eat it. Maybe an Alpo commercial.

 “Where is that dog? Where is she?!” But Finn, smart little devil that she is, has exited her doggy door to the patio and is staring at me from outside the glass sliding door. As I look angrily into her big bulging eyes I can’t help but notice that she is sitting erect now and her ears are pointing straight up—she doesn’t seem to be sorry or afraid anymore, in fact she appears to be saying, “Pen me up in the family room and that’s what you get big fella!”

 Oddly, Roe seems to be unfazed by all this commotion. In fact, incredibly, she seems almost a bit pleased, even smug.

 “Don’t you care? Don’t you care about what she has done to the TV?” I ask her. “She has destroyed my big screen TV!”

 There’s a long pause, a very long pause, as I stand there in stupefied suspense waiting to hear what the woman has got to say, and then finally, slowly, and not without glee she says, “Well...you didn’t seem to care too much when she ate my sofa did you?” And then another long pause to allow for full tsunami effect and then she continues, “But when it comes to your big screen TV, now we’ve got ourselves a big problem, don’t you honey?”

I couldn’t believe it. She got me again. And the really sorry thing is, she was right!

It’s true I didn’t care when Finn ate the sofa. I remember telling her, “We’ll just have to get another sofa cover honey.” And I…oh my gosh, I did take pleasure in the fact that it bothered her so much, but not me. And now it was payback time. Life is so orderly.

But wait a minute, maybe this wasn’t just a terrible accident. After all, it was she who told me it was a good idea to leave the TV on when we were gone. Could she have…? No. No. She could not be that clever…could she? …What’s that? What?!—the irritating voice was back.

 “Honey,” she said, “We’ll just have to get another speaker cover, won’t we? Sure hope you can get her fixed by Super Bowl Sunday!”

E-Mail Me                        Back to Archives              Back to Home Page